Hey PS3 owners, have you been waiting for the PSN equivalent of Trials HD? Well, Joe Danger's for you. Have you been waiting for a new side-scrolling Sonic the Hedgehog game? Then, Joe Danger is also for you. How about an HD version of Canabalt? Yep, Joe Danger is your game. Or, have you been missing those split-screen multiplayer racing games of old? It should be obvious by now: Joe Danger is the game you're looking for.

The little we've seen of Joe Danger up to now has been a bit misleading. It has come off as a simple, cartoony motocross-style racer. During my GDC demo, however, developer Hello Games name-dropped an intriguing, if not seemingly random list of celebrated inspirations for the game -- ranging from Tony Hawk to Super Monkey Ball. After a few moments of play, the shutouts made sense.

While it may appear to be a simple racing game, Joe Danger hides a surprising level of depth and complexity in its stunt system, while not being unapproachable. Tricks are very easy to perform: simply press L1 or R1. There's no need for complex button inputs or tricky stick twirls.

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You and your trusty White Knight Chronicles monster-slaying team don't have to repeat the same quests over and over again (though you will, simply for the experience and materials). Every Thursday, starting this week through June, Sony will add new quests to Level-5's RPG, visible in the world map, and all downloadable for free.

Each week, a new permanent quest will be available, along with limited-time quests that you can only download for two weeks. And to mark the occasion, Sony is giving away a 12-inch White Knight figurine to one lucky player that logs into one of six quests during a certain time period. See PlayStation Blog for all the details.

In a Japanese press release, Square Enix has announced that Final Fantasy XIII has shipped 5 million copies worldwide. Surprisingly, 3 million of those copies were shipped outside of Japan. Of course, Square Enix isn't saying how many of those copies have been sold, so bear that in mind when marveling over these impressive numbers.

These 5 million XIIIs, according to the release, bring the total number of shipped games in the Final Fantasy series up to 96 million. How many of those were ports or remakes of the first Final Fantasy, we wonder?

Three delays later, Mafia II looks like it's finally (finally!) getting ready to launch. It's been a long journey, and we spoke with 2K senior producer Denby Grace during GDC about the development time and what we can expect from the ambitious crime saga:

We've been waiting a very long time for this game haven't we?

Denby Grace, senior producer: The reason for the delay is polish. You'll see the game looks great as you play today. It's just not quite perfect, which is what we at 2K generally strive for. It's what we want to be known for, the quality of our games. Just having come so long, it would be foolish to release it too early.

Are there any specific reasons for the delay? What needed to be polished?

Technically there are a few things: the framerate isn't quite on the money yet. It's just the whole experience. One of the things we're spending a lot of time doing is focus testing. We're testing about twenty people a week. And it's getting that difficulty curve right. We want it to be hard, but we don't want it to be impossible like Mafia I. I don't know if you played the first game, but there was one mission when we shipped the game. Literally everyone failed until we released a patch. So we're really, really conscious about delivering a really balanced, proper difficulty curve. And then it's just bugs. It's an open world: ten square miles, fifty vehicles, a hundred environments. There were quite a lot of bugs in it!

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It seems like almost a year ago that I first saw Mafia II. That's probably because it was almost a year ago that 2K Czech (formerly Illusion Softworks) demoed live gameplay from the title (which had been announced nearly a year and a half before that.) Today, it was time to finally get my hands dirty as a virtual wiseguy, but first I had to put some clothes on.

In all seriousness, protagonist (I guess he's that, right?) Vito Scaletta had just woken up after a pretty wild night (judging by the various undergarments strewn around his bachelor pad) when my demo kicked off, so I of course jogged around turning on faucets and flicking light switches before actually doing what the game was instructing me to do: Get dressed. Leaving Vito's apartment, I stepped out into a world as pitch-perfect in its depiction of the 1950s -- the cars, the clothing, the architecture, the music -- as I can imagine. So what if the car that I hopped into and the place I was driving around -- Empire City -- never existed in any real era?

I spent the first few minutes of the demo causing all sorts of mayhem. Heck, the very first thing I did was get into a fender bender (putting it mildly) from which I fled, only to learn that the punishment for a hit-and-run in the '50s was, evidently, only a few dollar fine. But my trouble with the fuzz didn't end there.

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After a five-year hiatus, free-roaming felony franchise True Crime is set to return (sans subtitle) in Fall 2010. United Front, which is also working on the upcoming ModNation Racers and houses veterans from games such as Bully, Prototype and Scarface, is developing the new entry for PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360. Lead producer Jeff O'Connell describes it as a "more serious" reboot -- and a story that's more closely modeled after cop films. "It's an opportunity to be an innately good guy," he said of the undercover, under-pressure role you'll assume. "That's good drama."

Inspired by films like "The Departed" (see: "Infernal Affairs"), True Crime follows undercover lawman Wei Shen as he infiltrates the triad, slow-mo kicks enemies in the chin, and completes objectives across the game's new city playground. "Is it an accurate representation of Hong Kong?" O'Connell asked. "It's not." Despite referencing over 27,000 photographs, the city has been "tuned for gameplay," eschewing a realistic, street-for-street recreation in favor of a more cinematic and moody Hong Kong.

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R.U.S.E. is quite a crafty game. It turns out that the recently revealed June 3 release date was nothing but a smoke screen for the real date. The fully legitimate, actual release date is June 8. The game's PC beta began today and, according to Big Download, Ubisoft also announced the change in launch schedule. Normally, this kind of thing would be upsetting but, given the title, it just seems appropriate.

The beta, incidentally, is available now to all Steam users. It allows both single-player and multiplayer action with six different factions on seven multiplayer maps.

You know, we always thought GLaDOS ran the Portal simulation just so she could discover the true value of friendship, but it may really have been in the name of public service. In the video after the break -- created by Freddie Wong, who you probably recognize from his ridiculous (and hilarious) Guitar Hero video -- we get a glimpse at the likely ramifications of improper Portal gun training and how a few apathetic "friends" can ruin one of the most exciting experiences ever. And here, all this time, we thought GLaDOS was the bad guy!

Note: For those of you who spot that weird frame at the end of the video -- yep, with all that gibberish -- don't bother to decipher it. It's apparently just another gag from Freddie and "friends." Yuk-yuk-yuk.

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EA Sports' "Season Opener" event at GDC contained one major announcement for the developer's bevy of franchises: EA Sports Active will receive the sequel treatment this Fall with EA Sports Active 2.0 (working title), an updated version of the exergame for the PS3, Wii, iPhone and iPod Touch platforms. The console versions of the game will come equipped with two motion sensors and a heart rate monitor the player can strap to their arms and legs.

User information in this new game can be shared over an online social network, allowing fellow players to keep track of how frequently you've been skipping out on your demanding workout regimen. EA Vancouver is reprising its role as developer for the title. We'll let you know when we hear more about 2.0 -- like, for instance, why the game is apparently skipping out on launching on the 360.

Capcom has revealed the final new character for Super Street Fighter IV, and he's ... well, he's a giant dude covered in oil. Like, Hakan actually oils himself up before each round. This has the aesthetic effect of being extraordinarily off-putting, and the functional effect of allowing him to slide across the stage as if it were the Crocodile Mile. And since he's a grappling-type character, you get these really great squishing noises whenever he grabs another character.

See Hakan in action after the break, courtesy of IGN, and just try to imagine the design process behind this guy. Suddenly a green guy who can generate electricity sounds pretty low-key.

[Via PS3Attitude, thanks, Vallanthaz!]

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Want to decorate your virtual home with a knife-wielding monster, or an elusive sentient cactus? Of course you do. And for you, Square Enix is offering a selection of Final Fantasy XIII items for PlayStation Home starting this Thursday.

"Items to collect," the press release reads, "include a sofa, table, chair, shelves, planter set, Cactuar and Tonberry figures, and stuffed animals." You can see some of the goods with which you can festoon your nonexistent digs above. Square Enix didn't price any of them, but it ranges from 100 to 200 yen (around $1-2) each in Japan. It's a small price to pay for your very own Tonberry.

Though we've thoroughly enjoyed Just Cause 2's "Anatomy of a Stunt" videos, we're not sure the one you see posted above is accurately titled. Though the name "Rocket Launcher Jump" does capture some of the components of the stunt, it fails to mention a few other important buzzwords; namely "speedboat," "ramp," "explosion," "death," "aerial," and "unimaginably awesome."

Do yourself a favor and check out the video above, which we've chosen to remoniker "Unimaginably Awesome Speedboat Ramp Jump Aerial Rocket Launcher Explosion Death."