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Life is a side quest -- I wanna ride it all night long!


Kylie Prymus is the first columnist for PS Fanboy. A Ph.D candidate in philosophy, Kylie specializes in the sociology of technology. Through this new weekly column, Kylie will explore the impact of PlayStation on thought and culture.

I have returned, noble fanboys and fangirls! Yes returned to the land of milk and honey - if by milk you mean PixelJunk Eden and by honey you mean Soulcalibur IV. As I sat in my car staring at long stretches of side quest highway for hours, drooling at the though of returning home to days upon days of new games and DLC (not to mention resolving the heart-wrenching gamus interruptus of a few key titles ), I couldn't help but wonder if my extended absence from the PS3 had taught be anything. Besides the hard lesson that I most definitely need to invest in an HDMI capable monitor - or even better, a PS3 laptop - what did I learn from 6 weeks of quality time with naught save my PSP?

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Final Fantasy Tactics A2 trailer full of whimsy, tactics


It's actually pretty difficult for us to tell if the above trailer is any good -- you see, when the original Final Fantasy Tactics Advance came out, we played it until our GBA SP's brilliant backlight peppered our poor eyeballs with cataracts. From what we can tell through blurs and blind spots, Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift looks similar to it's last-gen predecessor, with a few minor graphical tweaks and improvements in sound. Considering Square-Enix has added a handful of new classes and races, and yet another lengthy single-player campaign, we're wondering where we can find a black market eyeball dealer/installer in our neck of the woods, and if they can pencil us in before the game's June 24 release date.

Kingdom Hearts composer Yoko Shimomura talks PS3 musical freedom


While video game music is no longer simply the series of 'beeps' and 'boops' it was in the past, it has nonetheless remained one of game design's -- groan -- unsung heroes. This isn't lost on tune-focused Music4Games, and in a recent interview with Kingdom Hearts composer Yoko Shimomura, she spoke out on a number of topics, including her thoughts on creating music for the PlayStation 3.

According to Shimomura, who is responsible for the tunes we'll be humming along to in Square Enix's upcoming Final Fantasy Versus XIII for the PS3, composing on Sony's current platform is much less limiting than it was in previous generations. "With the PlayStation 2, sound production...was a constant battle with memory and limitations," she recalled, adding that "with the PlayStation 3, I'm expecting to have it sound the way I please, without limitations." It's encouraging to hear someone at any level talk about creating content on the PS3 that doesn't involve the words "difficult" or "costly." However, with Square Enix continuing to play coy with regards to when its decade of Final Fantasy will actually kick off, it may be some time before our ears ring with the fruits of Yoko Shimomura's musical labor.

Final Fantasy IV trailer gets English subtitles


We here at Joystiq HQ are, as you might imagine, savvy world travelers, and therefore have a vast knowledge of the languages of many countries. Swedish, Italian, Esperanto -- one of us (we shall not reveal who) is even fluent in Klingon. Unfortunately, Japanese is one of our weaker subjects, thus a majority of the promotional material for Squeenix and Matrix Software's (the guys who made the DS remake of FFIII) recreation of the 1991 SNES role-playing classic Final Fantasy II (or IV, for purists) has largely gone over our heads.

Luckily for us, this astonishing trailer created from promotional footage already released in Japan comes with English subtitles -- not that words would be required to appreciate the visuals featured in this preview. Regardless of whether those CGI cutscenes make their way into the handheld package, the game's 3D models look fantastic, filling us with unbridled desire for some old-school crystal hunting. July 22 can not come soon enough.

FFXII composer bringing his music to non-Japanese games

For those of you who who can't seem to get Final Fantasy XII's battle music out of your head, there may soon be something else to hum along to as FFXII composer Hitoshi Sakimoto is looking to bring his musical style to a wider audience, including games produced outside of Japan.

Helping him in this will be Four Bars Intertainment, which also represents other game composers such as Jason Hayes (World of Warcraft), Inon Zur (Fallout 3, Crysis), and Jack Wall (Myst series). No games have been announced yet, though we doubt Sakimoto will lack for projects to fill his free time. Over the past two decades the workaholic composer has added more than 150 projects to his credit, including such titles as Vanillaware's GrimGrimoire and Odin Sphere, shooters Gradius V and Radiant Silvergun, plus a handful of anime releases as well -- many of which we've given our own spin while humming along to in the shower.

Final Fantasy IV coming to North America ... maybe

Role-playing fans can slip on their dancing shoes and party like it's 1991. A new interview with Final Fantasy IV director Takashi Tokita in the latest Nintendo Power seems to point to the game's recent DS remake being localized for North American audiences. Oh sure, he doesn't come right out and confirm the localization -- where's the drama in that? -- but given that the article comes peppered with English language screens and the game itself is featured on the cover, we're certainly leaning towards believing that the RPG will soon be getting some domestic love.

Tokita also toys with our emotions, speaking to the possibility of a remake of SNES RPG classic Chrono Trigger provided "the demand is great enough." Though like coming down hard off a caffeine high, he sends us crashing back down to earth by adding that he really wants to "create new titles and not just series installments and remakes." Yours is a cruel love, mon cher.

[Via DS Fanboy]

Chocobo's Dungeon kweh-ming to North America in July


Be sure to check your teeth for cavities after this post, as Square Enix will bring an extra dose of saccharine sweetness to the Wii this summer by way of Final Fantasy Fables: Chocobo's Dungeon. The game, designed for both RPG enthusiasts and fans who spend their nights imagining dressing up the company's iconic yellow birds, will ship on July 8, and its asking price of just $39.99 won't leave your wallet looking for a phoenix down.

According to Squeenix, this overdose of cute will find Final Fantasy stalwarts Cid and Chocobo hunting for treasure while trying to solve the mystery of a strange town full of people who have lost their memories. The game will even take the cute online via Wi-Fi card battles featuring a darling "3D pop-up book style." Kweh!

[Via Nintendo Wii Fanboy]

Final Fantasy vs. Dead or Alive: Round 2

We're not sure how he does it or how long it takes him, but animator and generally insane fight choreographer "Montyoum" has once again delved into the many unwritten volumes of fan fiction buried inside our minds and rendered each page in startling, over-the-top clarity. After allowing Samus and Master Chief to find love on the battlefield, Montyoum orchestrated a crossover between the elaborately endowed gals of Dead or Alive and a trio of Final Fantasy femme fatales, labeling the ludicrous result "Dead Fantasy."

Above you'll find the sequel, an even bigger display of absurd acrobatics, imaginative pummeling and blissful ignorance of the laws of physics. We love it.

[Thanks, dara hoy]

New Crisis Core trailer shows off summons, butt rock


Watching this trailer may embed some niggling questions in your mind -- questions like: Is it safe to run on top of trains? Why does Cloud have black hair? Who at Square Enix decided that story-rich fantasy and gut-crunching metal were a good mix? However, this video should eliminate any question in your mind that a spiritual sequel to a 3-disc RPG masterpiece could fit on a UMD. Focusing mostly on summons, a Final Fantasy staple, this trailer has pushed our excitement for Crisis Core far beyond our apprehension towards the game. We just hope the final product has music of a more ... listenable variety.

Final Fantasy Tactics A2 not released B4 June 24


Two crushing disappointments awaited us in the latest Square Enix press release. The first, admittedly, was entirely due to our misreading of the subject line and consequent imagining of the many, many flavors Final Fantasy Tictacs could contain. Just think: You'd have the sour Squall-flavored ones, the spicy Red XIIIs, a couple of Cloud candies (indiscernible from Sephiroth flavor) , the Tidus fruit droplets and ... well, now you see why were so disappointed.

Similarly, we didn't quite appreciate the North American release date for Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift. You'll only be able to stick the third part of the "Ivalice Alliance" into your DS on June 24th, which is quite a long way off if you're a Final Fan of strategic RPG-ery. Square Enix promises it'll be worth the wait though, as the grimoire comes packed with 400 quests, "polished game mechanics," stylus controls and new jobs and classes.

Another huge Crisis Core media update

Octaslash? Come on now, that's a bit un-inventive. Sounds kind of dumb, but we're willing to bet that move is going to look wickedly stylish in the actual game. Aside from that one odd naming scheme, these screenshots of Crisis Core are spectacular.

We sure are excited for this game, especially after seeing these nostalgic screens. Also, some in-game cut scene vids have made there way up on the interwebs; those, too, are loaded with nostalgia. Check out the gallery below, and the trailers after the break.

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FF7 Crisis Core receiving special edition in UK [updated]

We're well aware that only two groups of people are going to be interested in this particular bit of news. The first, of course, is the set of people eagerly awaiting the English version of Square Enix's portable Final Fantasy VII prequel, Crisis Core. Though American fans are due to receive the PSP game later this month, folks in the UK have to wait a bit longer. The wait may not be without reward, however, as a "Special Pre-Order Edition" of Crisis Core: FF7 (complete with obligatory art book and slipcase) has been spotted on certain retailer websites. Eurogamer notes that an announcement is "imminent," and suggests that offers for the rest of Europe may differ.

Oh, and the other group? That would be the smaller and decidedly more eccentric bunch that absolutely hates the F7 key for no apparent reason. We apologize if Google search picked up on our headline and led you astray. Personally, we've never cared much for that tilde key.

[Update: You can now see the special edition (animated and spinning!) on the official Crisis Core website.]

[Via PSP Fanboy]

Rumor: Special edition Crisis Core in Europe [Updated]

Eurogamer is reporting that a special edition of Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core might be on the way to Europe, or at least to the UK. Although Square Enix has yet to officially confirm it, UK retailers such as Gamestation have already begun hosting details about the special ed on their websites. Called the "Special Pre-order Edition," it will come in nice slipcase packaging, and will also included a 48-page hardbound art book. The special ed is available only when the game is pre-ordered at regular price; so there's no multiple pricing schemes going on -- just reservations.

If this does indeed prove to be true, it seems like an enticing little incentive for Europeans not to purchase the North American version soon to release in less than two weeks. Especially since NA has a fixed date and Europe has a vague spring release, we suppose Square Enix needs something extra to keep crafty Euros from importing. Well, an art book and slipcase sure do beat our UMD cases.

[Update: You can now see the special edition on the official Crisis Core website. Nice.]

FFCC: My Life as a King to be WiiWare launch title, price revealed


A Square-Enix insider recently revealed that Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life as a King (formerly The Little King and the Promised Land) would share a May 12th U.S. release date with the WiiWare service, joining Defend Your Castle and Major League Eating: The Game for the somewhat less than auspicious WiiWare launch lineup. The game will set you back 1,500 Wii points, or $15, if you prefer an actual monetary system.

We never thought we'd be hotly anticipating a Final Fantasy/Sim City mash-up, but when our other choices are limited to a once-free flash game that's been available online for nearly five years, or a game that crudely depicts the action-packed world of aggressive binge eating, the least of the three evils is abundantly clear.

Final Fantasy VII ported to the Famicom. Finally!


Remember back in the late '90s, when Square was so frustrated trying to fit their opus Final Fantasy VII onto the cartridge-based Nintendo 64 that they made their famous defection to Sony? Well, just a short decade later, China's Shenzhen Nanjing Technology Co, Ltd has apparently done what Square couldn't, squeezing the PlayStation epic onto a cartridge. And not just any cartridge .. a Famicom cartridge. How's it feel to be shown up, Square?

Of course, the conversion isn't perfect. According to a write-up from intrepid blogger CinnamonPirate (who unearthed the 2MB ROM from a Chinese blog) the polygonal graphics and cut scenes are gone, replaced with an impressively wide array of sprites, many stolen from other Final Fantasy games. The story remains surprisingly authentic, though, encompassing the entire three-disc epic while only leaving out a few optional side stories (bye bye, Yuffie and Vincent). The wide array of weapons, magic and materia from the original is a bit restricted in the port, but frankly, we're impressed that features like materia-leveling made it on to the 20+ year old hardware in any form.

The company behind the cart is apparently now primarily makes MP3 players, so our hopes for a Colecovision version of Final Fantasy XII will probably remain unfulfilled.

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